It seemed like a good idea at the time.
My son’s birthday was coming up and I had a recipe for coconut cake I’d wanted to try. He’s pretty adventurous and working with a fresh coconut had a certain attraction. Namely, a hammer.
The recipe had a sidebar with instruction and illustrations on getting the milk out of the coconut. He hammered three holes into the eyes and we tipped the coconut over a measuring cup.
Three drops of milk plopped out. Then….nothing. We shook, we could hear the sloshing inside, a few more dribbles came out. We stuck the nail back in, twisted it around and produced a few more dribbles. My daughter went to the drawer where all the random plastic things accumulate and pulled out a straw. We stuck it in one hole, I covered the second and he blew. Finally, the coconut was emptied. It didn’t produce the 1 cup the recipe said it would, but we proceeded.
The cake turned out fine. Next step: toasting the ribbons of coconut flesh. A couple of wacks with the hammer, and the coconut fell open after baking, just at the second sidebar had described. I looked for the instructions on toasting the shavings. Nothing.
I was about to learn that there is a reason people buy shredded coconut in bags. Coconut is concave, the peelers are straight. See the problem?
After some pretty tough attempts to get those delightful ribbons of flesh, I pulled the box grater out of the cupboard. No instructions on how to toast the coconut either? I guessed. 350’ and some Pam on the cooking sheet worked just fine.
Now, 10:35pm on a Sunday, it was time to move on to the icing. I do not have a good track record with icings, and the kids were long in bed. This time, I had a new weapon: a candy thermometer. What a difference having the right tools makes.
No guessing over soft-ball or hard-ball stages of the sugar solution – I watched the blue-mercury-substitute rise and voila – a crystalline, bubbling mass transformed my egg whites into pearly ripples of Italian meringue. It was delightful.
I iced, pressed toasted coconut into the sides and called it a night.
When the candles were lit the next night, it looked fantastic. And tasted pretty good too.